Alcohol, tobacco and firearms rule,
They are the one-stop shop,
They are the reason the site is good,
For their use shall not stop.
The tobacco is used to keep workers going,
To keep them on a high,
That nicotine serves to stretch their nerves,
And the hours simply fly.
The firearms are used to threaten,
Those who do not belong,
They are also used as a punishment,
For HTML programmers who get it wrong.
The alcohol is used as a carrot,
Like that in front of a horse,
For the workers are promised a p!ss-up,
If the site's good, of course.

Cheers from the Land of Oz