A long while ago some verse was placed
Of Bastards in Hell drinking beer
Mention was made of a need for ice
I think my course is clear

You want ice? You got it!
Although it might be hard
There won't be any in The Glow
Maybe I'll try Boneyard

For we will certainly need it
Drinking beer in hell
But since I come from England
I'll drink it warm just as well

I'm glad to be a Bastard
The poetic trade to ply
Thinking back to Ymir's invite to join
I even rhymed in reply

But now I have to tell you
There's beer ad then there's BEER
I'm talking of the stuff I drink
Way, way over here

The name's of some of these beers
Will really make you titter
It seems to be a convention
When naming Stout, Mild, and Bitter:

Ruggie's Russet Nectar
Belly Rumbler, Belly Ringer
Andrew's Cobblestone Stout
Dog Bolter, Bishop's Finger

Deep Shaft Stout, Reekit Yill
Copperwinkle, Welder's Armpit
Old Cantankerous, Old Peculiar, Old Fart
(In "The Lost Boy's" it's Grandpa's favorite)

Blunderbus Old Porter
Pendle Witches Brew
Hundreds more are out there
These are just a few

So raise a glass, make a toast
Enjoy this infernal repose
We'll sing and sup a pint or three
Then tweak the Devil's nose

Cheers from the...

Cheers fr...

Cheers!
Jonesy