This went well one time
Except for Doug who can't count
to five, seven, five

Let's try it again
The rules are very simple
Just write some haiku

Tell me about life
The universe and more stuff
you know, everything

Quiet keys clicking
Make the words appear on screen
Then click "Add Reply" 

Haiku

I am entertained
Very easily by fire
I don't have cable.

Napalm does smell good
Just after the dawn has broke
The gel sticks to kids

Haiku

The world is cruel
My heart does not bleed for you
Go suck on an egg

Mondays are weak sauce
They burn like ten thousand suns
Should've stayed in bed.

Haiku

I won't touch Bluecross
with a thirty five foot pole
His vestibule smells

Animated corpse
of the former president
does not feel the pain

Haiku

Difficult to write
With the squirming and yelling
I can't concentrate

Haiku

Satan is my bud
We'd write haiku together
But the paper burns

Haiku

Unruly haiku
Raging against the machine
Those nuns deserved worse.

Haiku

Freeform poems are quick
They don't even have to rhyme
Structure is useful.

I can put words here
Or I can scatter them there
I prefer not to.
-----

The invader waits
For his robot to finish
eating the tacos

Chocolate cupcake
in place of the guidance chip
Quite throughly lost

Silent sentries stand
with pointed hats and lasers
in the doomed front yard

Haiku

I know no fishes
But they don't seem so happy
with lips on a hook

Haiku

Canadian train
Makes me late to get to work
I need more caffeine

Haiku

Haiku may be poems
But not all poems are haiku
You need the format.

My love is a clock
Ticking, ticking it drains
for you, Berserker

Haiku

This is for haiku
Not your random poetry
Please stick to the rules

Eloquence is tough
when constricted by odd rules
I am not being harsh

Haiku

So I miscounted
I apologize for my
indiscretion, mate

The requirements
were to post in Haiku form
Eat a bag of hell.

Haiku

Write me a haiku
It doesn't have to be long
just five, seven, five

It's a hidden art
to compress so much meaning
into a small space

Edit: I repaired
my malformed haiku thusly
No talking of leaves

Did I mention I hate my life?

You smile
Sweetly
Softly
Kindly
Sadly

The words
Kind
Soothing
Crushing
Familiar

My heart
Sinks
Quietly
Slowly
Broken

Reply
Yeah
Sure
I understand
Lies

More words
I hate
Annoying
Automatic
Ignored

Reply
Of course
Mmm hmm
Sure
Lies

Come home
Alone
Tired
Want to die
Did I mention I hate my life?