Ok, ok, I'll make a choice 
twixt unpronounceable, or pepper 
It's time I excercised my voice 
Or shun me like a leper                 

the pepper red is mighty fine 
I've eaten quite a few 
but tame as toast I find the taste 
as bland as oatmeal stew                 

so one more spanner in the works 
a tiny alteration make 
to be consistent with our world 
and give our gullets a break                 

I nominate another plant 
and don't think me a mean-o 
but no peppers ever nuked so well 
as our friend the jalapeno                 

(tis a pepper, no? tis radioactive, yes?) 
who wouldn't like this newest guess?                 

Lerk                 

spanner thrower 
general rabble rouser

To our brave and noble Buffy,
This I give to you,
You asked how fast I could write,
A poem on ICQ.
Well, here it is, my absconded friend,
I hope you like it's style,
This is something I've forged quickly,
Not thought about for a while.
ICQ is an electronic friend,
Faster than the post,
But the way that you reach people,
Is what I like the most.
It's user friendly and very fast,
Easy to a dunce,
But the thing that I like best of all,
You can have multi-talks at once.
Take what's happening at this very moment,
As I write this line,
I've got Doom and Bee in my ear,
And Buffy's doing fine.
She's chatting away with the best of 'em,
She's got lots to say,
She really like an old pro,
In the nicest possible way.
With ICQ you make new friends,
Even an enemy or two,
The enemy bit is a contentious point,
I guess it's up to you.
So, subscribe to this wondrous thing,
I promise you won't regret that,
I look forward to you downloading,
So we can have a chat.                             

Sand

I am a chicken,
I eat Sand.

It helps me digest,
as I graze the land.

I am a chicken,
I squawk and squawk.

I am a chicken,
I don't speak English...


*cluck cluck cluck*,
*cluck cluck cluck*

*cluck cluck cluck*,
*cluck cluck sand.*

Chronicles of Uncertainty

I've learned so much on this crazy path
of unplanned self discovery
A bizarre chronical of misspent time
Essential to ascend towards some sane form of recovery

Still unsure of what lies in wait
A path thats not too straight and narrow
Somewhat of a non-entity, no longer discontent
Lost are nightmares of the sins, that I cannot repent

There is a future, somewhere distant
A sun not yet on my horizon shines
The nimbus that was guiding me, no longer up above
Today I'll live for me alone...just one step at a time

Most likely I will faulter, perhaps stumble, maybe fall
One thing I know for certain, I must take down the wall
This life it isn't perfect, sometimes we must feel pain
For if we feel, we love, then something has been gained.

"Disjointed Fingers"

""Disjointed Fingers" Poem."
The title comes from the fact that the words to this came sorta brokenly (hence disjointed) to me, as well as the fact that it talks about fingers. La. I haven't even reread it after i wrote it, so, there you have it. Fresh off the press. Wrote it in this window even! La. La twice.
*HUGS*

Red gold ring finger,
Singing through another night
To blast away the dream seeds
Feeding with all their might.
Deep teeth in this brain coil,
Spoil the milk as it rots where it stands,
Understand that I'm tying my hands
Keep from cutting the deep veins
Straining to hold a life together.
Never wanted nothing but the loving of the self
Destructiveness. Irresponsibility, quick to be
To annihilate me, assure existance by destroying
Own subsistance?
Red gold ring finger,
Singing to a blood red moon,
Soon to be nothing but a shadow
Marring the horizon.
At the end of the day, the sun always wants to sink,
I'll drink to that.

"Recognition of a Friend (for D.R.)"

My hair grew like summer days
Longer and longer
You caught strands of it between
your gentle fingers
And when i came to pacing
You stilled my feet
You took my implements of self-destruction
Somewhere away from me

Then, like that,
You were gone
I got a call that my grandmother
still has on her answering machine
(which is my old answering machine)
Lauren asking me if i had heard
Me insisting that it was lies
Screaming that it was all lies
Begging that fate let it all be a lie

But i saw the flowers
And i saw the casket
And i met the girl who had held your hand last
A volunteer for the ambulance team
Who watched slow moments of final,
fateful
suffering

Cried, i did, i cried an ocean
I flooded the shores with my tears
Every song i heard echoed your voice
And things i had long since put away,
Skeletons you had insisted that i burn,
Came back to haunt me,
Came back to tear and to claw at me

But then you touched me in a dream
The strands of my hair which i had shorn
Days before you had gone--And i am
remembering that i never told you,
That i knew that i would have forever to tell you
Someday, my friend,
We will walk down the last path together
And i shall have forever to tell you.

New years eve

On thise day,
Ther is mutcg to say
About Life, and
opertunitys that lies
All around us in the skys.

The years go by
And so do I
Waitning for the world
To be heared

Life is like a clowd
A clowd the flys in the wind
of the universe
The planet that we occupie
Is but a star in the sky
That whould be kind of hard
to occupie if it all
wher just a Pie!

---Cheers from Sweden at 01.15! 1st january1999----------------------

Sawgrass by rough cliff,
I swim in fierce saltwater,
so cold, wish for you.

Sand

the white powdered sand beneath her, beneath me...
do you remember it well, my wounded? you minx.

the warm soft bed we made that night, around us...
did you savour it as i did, my beauty? you angel.

the dizzying intoxication of her purity, in me...
can i have it again some day, on my lips? you dream.

the ever rising level of rythmic movement, with her...
shall we ever let it be forgotten, my passion? you vision

the raw molten heat of our oneness, in her...
does the memory bring you some back, my fire? you warmth

the slowly nearing explosive end, was everywhere...
oh, do recall with me those rolling moments, my one? your two?

the subsiding tingling recouperation, drawn out...
the wonderment at the power of words, my friendship heart? you woman.

(ps: do you remember? *prrrrrowl* "you amaze me")

well... sand... sea shell dust it is....

thanks

I never corssed the boundaries
That separated me from you
So taken in and mesmerized
Not sure what I should do
Possessing these awakening thoughts
I've seen clearly as a vision
Dare I cross the tracks that lead to this division?
So many questions come to light
Are they left better in the dark?
What is it like in your arms
Is this a solitairy spark?
Talking to you for hours,
Never bored with what you say
I look into your gorgeous eyes
All my cares just fade away
Knowing I can look, not touch
This is driving me insane
An unspoken admiration
Have all these thought just been in vain?

All I am

Is this all I am?
Just a man
Who doesn't understand

Is this all I can be?
Just a man
Who doesn't understand

This is all I am
Take away the pain
And there's nothing left

This is all I am
Take away the pain
And there's nothing left

Intrinsic

Most of my poems tell a story... but I'm feeling more introverted tonight.

Intrinsic

I look in the mirror,
and hate what I see.
I gaze in the mirror,
and there is only me.


I look in my eyes,
desire fire, claim flame,
I examine my eyes,
and perceive only shame.


I scan my complexion,
Where's the iron? Where's the steel?
I stare at my reflection,
and disgust is what I feel.


Every moment of my life,
I remember a mistake,
and every second of my life,
is a second I'd re-take.


Regrets and remorse,
and a life which I waste,
throughout the course
of a story without grace.


The potential lies within me,
I am sure, that I could show
the many evils that surround me,
a resolve they could never know.


Would that I was a hero,
a man of action, with virtues plain,
would that I was a hero,
Instead of Abel, I am Cain.

Sand

sand below me,
surrounding,
impounding my skin.

slowly drowning,
pulling me forward,
engulfing my mind
in shifting caress's.

not releasing,
clutching, gripping
now at my waist,

my body forsaken,
winds swirling this
mask around my limbs,

hands pulling at visible
forces unable to grasp,
and a mind misunderstanding

coming to grips.

'Twas in twilight
you found me,
down upon my knee,
whispering quiet words
to a god I cannot see.
'Twas in darkness
that I met thee,
down upon my knee
lost in reverie
to a god I cannot see.
'Twas in moonlight
you sat with me,
down upon my knee
forgotten in time
by a god I cannot see.
'Twas in sunrise
that I left thee,
down upon your knee
seeking answers
from a god you cannot see.

I thought I saw a rainbow
In a starry twilight sky
It gave me hope to carry on
But not to question why..
Inquistive by nature
I asked the question that arose
The answer wasn't what I thought,
That's just the way it goes..

Always in a downward spin
Spiraling out of control
Keep on clawing right back up
Don't give up and fold

Such an iron maiden
A picture portayed by some
Shaken..with a spirit bruised
So completely come undone

Something always made me smile
But now is faded, gone away
There are no colors anymore
It all just fades to grey...

I thought I saw a rainbow
In a starry twilight sky
It gave me hope to carry on
But not to question why..
Inquistive by nature
I asked the question that arose
The answer wasn't what I thought
Thats just the way it goes..
Always in a downward spin
Feeling out of control
Keep on clawing right back up
Don't give up and fold
Such an iron maiden
A picture portayed by some
Shaken..with a spirit bruised
So completely come undone
Something always made me smile
But now is faded, gone away
There are no colors anymore
It all just fades to grey...

I see the passion in your eyes
Building flames of desire
Are you so really unaware
Of your effect, or do you care?

You've made me smile
And made me blush
I see your smile
And get a rush.

Are you for real
Or just a dream
Cause you're the best thing
That I've seen.

Your words..they haunt me,
Tease me..give me a high
I have no answers..
And don't know why.

I saw us walking hand in hand
A moonlit beach with nice warm sand
Your soft lips, so close to mine
Feels like heaven....so devine.

So if I'm dreaming
Please let me sleep
For, a dream about you
Beats counting sheep.

She is all, all of you
There is nothing that you would not do.
The sight is cause for heart to flutter,
And to force your speech to stutter.
For the merest glimpse will start you flying,
Towards the celestial sight you’re spying.
All around her an aroma wonders,
And the faintest whiff will cause you to ponder,
“What is that scent? That glorious thing!
Like flowers and honey, it makes my heart sing!”
And if she utters a single word,
Truly, a more glorious sound could not be heard.
The slightest of touches, a caress of the hand,
Your legs will melt, and you can not stand.
And a more noble soul you never will find,
She is loving, compassionate, gentle, and kind.
If she asked for all, all is what you would give.
But all that she wants is to love and to live.
If she is around, a feeling of total completeness arrives,
If she ever left you, you could not survive.
Whoever had her, there you would find,
The luckiest man, in all of mankind.

You have just brought a tear,
To an old man's eye,
Not from any sentimentailty,
In it abug did fly.
Or maybe it was a pesky form of,
Buzzing killer bee,
I'm off the track yet again,
It's so easy - do you see.
Your poem was a thing of beauty,
The rhythm was quite good,
The way you worked in your subjects,
Pleased me where I stood.
Your rhyming scheme was crafted well,
The scheme was good, too,
The only thing I didn't like,
Was the self-beration doen by you.
Don't have a go at yourself,
Enjoy the poetic ride,
Any criticism of your work,
Is completely unjustified.
So, write down such things often,
To the very moon do howl,
And how 'bout reworking the tune of "Batman",
For the Ode to Night Owl?
Thus, you have pleased me greatly,
And to help your work to grow,
A membership to the Poetry Bastards,
Is the gift that I bestow.                                                    

Good job!                                                    

Cheers from the Land of Oz

Sand

I lie on the beach,
Water tickles at my toes,
A vast expanse of clear sky is my blanket.

And next to me on the shore…
Stands my castle in the sand.

The waves will come
And slowly tear down the walls
But for now, I lie next to my castle in the sand.

So numb from feeling, I don't notice the pain
There's just so much to lose, but nothing to gain.
There's a black empty void my head seems to be in
A dark cloud that follows, remnants of things.
I cant' talk anymore, I'm all out of words
When it falls on deaf ears, perhaps they are yours?

It's ok, stop the world, cause I wanna get off
I'm tired, wore down, completely tore up
Can't handle the bullshit, I've had enough
Like a bandaid on a gaping wound,
There for appearance, not out of love

Always the thorn, but seldom the Rose
My words are my offering, a true gift of prose
This gift cannot equal, what your offering has been
Your heart I hold dearly, it's your spirit I can't win

And you know, one day I'm going to...say something.
Other than “Nothing.”
Cause I have many things I need to say, but don't.
Maybe I’m afraid, or won't?

But I ramble, given to long winded discussion.
Cause I can't handle the repercussions.
I'm going crazy over a single word.
Something I’ve never said, something I’ve never heard.

Love.

Acidic personality

I thought if I...
Just hung around awhile...
My good qualities...
Would rub off on you...
On the contrary...
You invaded my mind...
And laughed hysterically...
All I ever wanted...
Was to help you...
But instead...
Your acidic personality...
Started eat away...
Slowly at my life...
Shredding it...
Piece by peice...
Till I had no life...
And your corrosive words...
Stung me deeply...
Maybe I shouldn't have...
Been so careless...
The box you came in...
Had no warning...
I tried not to be...
Judgemental...
But it looks like...
Everyone was right...
About you...

Paraleliality.

I sit.
Not now, nor then.
Just here.
I sit, as time flows around me.


I sit.
In the endless void.
Never knowing truely.
Where i am, or what i was.
If ill ever be.

I am Paraleliality.
Time means not for me.
Present , past, and Future still.
All are they around me.
Spun, abound, Spin unwind.

Around me all is spun.
The Threds of time
Since time begun.
Without me there is Naught.
And still it turns, and twists about.
Time flows til time runs out.
I am It, the who the What.
Never truely bound.

I Am Paraleliality.
Around me, all is spun.


^Fin^

Sand

a torrent misma of sand raised up
hands of light piercing through it
the strange mystical veil of darkness

seeking an eye through one of those light wounds
hiding away
digger, cover myself
a sand mystery blotting out
everything I've ever done

a shooting glimpse of the outside
passing over the pouring particles
can only be watched

dug down
under my blanket
keeping in out and out in
real life passes by, behind
this sand charade of haze

It's been awhile since I've written anything, but it requested that I pick up the pen again. *winks at JC*. Thanks for getting me back into a creative mode again.

A memory that won't erase
My thoughts they turn to you
So much shared together
I could not sort lies from truth

A feeling that you're with me
Yet, so very far away
But I was never real to you,
Just a game you chose to play.

How do I wipe these thoughts
That haunt me constantly..
I played with fire, a real slow burn
Why did I not see?

Blinded by your feelings
Of what I thought was real.
I've forgotten what trust is,
And lost my sense of feel.

I still miss you, baby
Just afraid to let it show.
If you reading this, you know it's yours
Please hold on and don't let go.

Places

So many faces I don't want to see
So many places I don't want to be
But I've seen them all
And I've been everywhere

So many things I don't want to know
So many places I don't want to go
But I've heard them all
And I've been over there

Now I'm coming home, baby
But I don't know to where

"Birthday Ramblings"

As is normal,
I woke up way too early.
Glared at my alarm clock,
tempted to throw it out the nearby window
Which someone so thoughtfully left open for me
(i think they're trying to freeze me to death--
but this is paranoia, perhaps)
And then i realize that is indeed
My birthday, which does not cheer me much
Nor stir any enthusiasm in my sleep-deprived heart
But i gather me up and get me moving anyways.
The people who were predestined to give me presents
Have done so. The presents this year made me smile
Like i have not smiled in ages. Not that they were
extrordinarily great not expensive presents--i
smiled because they were presents of people who
were anxiously trying to show that they cared
about me, and this always sits well with me.
Now, on my actual birthday, i am expecting nothing more
Than a call from my mom, who is away in Florida,
A few dollars from my dad, who is not much in the way of creative presents,
A geometry test from my geometry teacher, bless her little soul,
A standardized test from the state of Pennsylvania, bless their multiple corroded souls,
And a callback from the audition i went to yesterday
That i am not really expecting but crying for anyways
All in all, it may prove to be interesting
It may prove to be hideous,
It may prove that birthdays are destined to be doomed
(as mine always seem to be)
But it also proves i'm one year closer
To being out all on my own.

The Knight and the Dragon.

Once upon a time, in a land far away,
the sun rose up, and it was day.
And everyone was happy and gay.
But that doesn't make a good story.
It's not exciting, riveting, or gory.

So once upon a time, in a land over the sea,
there was a land were everyone could be.
Be happy, be sad, be like you or me,
but that doesn't make a good tail.
At least, not before the Wail.

The Wail could be heard all throughout the land.
Heard by small children, playing in the sand.
Heard by the petty, heard by the grand.
But that doesn't make a good telling.
Not when there's still foes that need felling.

And following the Wail came the horrible Shnauss.
He ravaged, he razed, he made himself the boss.
He never took a shower, and refused to floss.
But that doesn't make a good myth.
Not flossing just gave him a lythp.

Shnauss was really a horrible type.
He ate raw vegetables that weren't nearly ripe.
He murdered and sacked and hit people with tripe.
But that doesn't make a good history.
Why I'm even saying this is a mystery.

Many a hero fought the cruel killer.
Some had endorsments, from Doritos and Miller,
And this whole stanza is really just filler,
But that doesn't make a good fable.
Failed heroes, who just were not able.

And then came along the honorable Shmuck.
A bumbler he was, but had amazing luck.
With the likes of Shnauss he would have no truck.
But that doesn't make a good epic.
Shmuck was ugly, and smelled like a septic.

Shmuck and Shnauss, they had a fight,
but a bald-headed boy was a more interesting sight,
A little brunette laughed, and a tree ate a kite.
But that doesn't make a good comic.
It doesn't even make sense if you're Islamic.

For the dangerous dragon breathed fire,
It burned bright, and the knight's straits were dire,
but he fought back, and struck down the dragon with ire.
But that doesn't make a good rap.
You ask why? I'm afraid you're a sap.

The dragon was alive! It snuck up from behind,
bit off the knight's head, chewed it up like a rind,
And truly, he was very very unkind...
But that doesn't make a good ending.
You're not catching the message I'm sending.

The dragon then flew to the castle of the king,
landed in the courtyard, and let his call sing,
the king came out and pinned a medal on his wing.
And THAT, that will make a for a truly good poem.
For Shnauss was the knight planted deep in the loam.

*shrug* Sometimes I get bored. Weird stuff happens

Sand

a torrent misma of sand raised up
hands of light piercing through it
the strange mystical veil of darkness

seeking an eye through one of those light wounds
hiding away
digger, cover myself
a sand mystery blotting out
everything I've ever done

a shooting glimpse of the outside
passing over the pouring particles
can only be watched

dug down
under my blanket
keeping in out and out in
real life passes by, behind
this sand charade of haze

Poem I wrote early this morning.. The first two lines have been in my head for the past two days, so I figured it must be something I needed to get out.
Oh say can you see
Through the grey smoke filled skies
Just how badly we failed
At airport security
And the jet airliners there
Burst through buildings, mid-air
Gave proof to the lies
That our safety was there
Oh say can you see that
Star spangled banner still wave
Through the tears that we shed
At the ground zero grave.


I'm not quite what to make of it myself. I'm a bit on the numb side from all the friends that I've lost. Every emotion has run through me this past week. The only real joy I had was when I found out my cousin quit his job at the trade center and his wife escaped from the 85th floor. It's been a horrible week, I'm at a loss for words that make any sense.

Oh Fear.

Oh Fear
Oh Pain
Oh Me
Oh Me
I hate dentists.
Whouldent you agree?
Oh Fear
Oh Lawnmower
Oh Me
Oh Me
I hate homework.
Whouldent you agree?
Oh Fear
Of Fire
Oh Me
Oh Me
Oh Fear
Of Fire
Whouldent you agree?
Oh Fear
Corruption
No Glee
No Glee
You Take all
That is happy
From Me.

Oh Fear,
oh Fear,
Oh me
oh me...

The weather's absolutley wonderful,
In the Land Of Oz,
It's autumn in the this wonderous land,
But I'm comfortable because,
The wood fire's embers are glowing,
From the night before,
But it's still quite glorious,
If you venture out the door.
As for where I have my humble home,
The answer comes to hand,
I am quite lucky to be living in,
The state they call Queensland.                                                    

Cheers from the Land of Oz

Sand

Sand...hmmmm...rightio then
*ahem*

There once was a man from iceland
Who liked to roll 'round in the sand.
It got in his britches,
And it had 'em in stitches
But when the coppers showed up he was banned.

Thankye

Tell Me (TR 25/02/01)

All I ask is sincerity
And a chance to prove
That I mean what I'm saying
And I've got just as much lose

Whatever you offer of yourself
Even if it's your heart on the line
I'm ready and willing to match it
In fact I've already given you mine

I'm down on my knees, I'm praying
That what you're saying to me is true
Can't you hear me begging
Don't let fear get the better of you

I believe you want what I'm offering
But you're afraid of opening your heart
And that alone will end this love
Before it's even had a chance to start

I know where it is you're coming from
You know, I've been hurt as well
But passing up a chance at love
Is my idea of hell

So I get hurt an awful lot
Probably more than I should
But at the end of the day I know
That I did everything I could

Can you see why I can't just let you go
Why I'm willing to put up a fight
Why letting this chance pass us both by
Couldn't possibly be right

If I have got it all wrong
If you care nothing for me
Then please forgive my arrogance
And I will let you be

Otherwise tell me what I can do to prove
That I'm worth the risk you'd take
I'll do anything you want
To prove that I'm no fake

That is all that I can give to you
A chance at love and my heart to break
There's nothing more I can offer
The next move is yours to make

So tell me honestly before I go
Do you want to hold me near?
Or was everything you said a lie?
Or will you just submit to fear?

If everyone was smart,
And everyone was rich,
And everyone was sane,
And humanity had won it's game,
I just would not be able
To give up my ancient fight.
I've fought for light,
I've fought for life,
I've fought for death,
I've crossed the world,
I've crossed the wastes,
I've fought for the most barren place,
And I will fight for the right side,
Maybe.

I know the rights,
I know the wrongs,
Why does humanity,
Just bend itself out of shape?
For a paper or a book,
Or a teacher or a God,
Or a mirror and a Dog that are in the end all the same?

Can we touch the sky all alone?
No. I don't think were home.
We haven't even passed the door,
Into the next great age.

Why was it I was built for a great task,
That never came to pass?
How long can I last?
Maybe I'll truly live at last.
Even thou I'm all alone.
An abandoned man who left his home,
And a goal that never came to be.
A broken man without destiny.
Thus I am touched by my insanity.

exactly what is it to be human? 
this is something we all try to understand. 
many seek the answers deep within the mind. 
but to focus only on part is make yourself blind.           

there are many parts to constitute the whole. 
all of which combine to give us our unique soul. 
giving each and every one a perspective like no other. 
as we go through our days and lives, who we are, trying to discover.           

doing what we can to improve and be our best, 
i believe is ultimately humankind's quest. 
for we are unique and everchanging, 
and we shall constantly be rearranging.           

searching to find the best of the light, 
correct the wrongs and make things right. 
so that one day, all children will see, 
a world that exists in cooperation and harmony.           

you'll have to forgive. i just wrote this up as i was posting. 
the muse struck while i was in a slightly philosophical mood. ;)      

"On Self Loathing"

Note: While I wrote this poem with Becca in mind, it is really for anyone who has ever been depressed or hated themselves. That road's a dead end... probably literally.
"On Self Loathing"

A man who loathes himself is a man who is a fool,
or at least is unable to see the shining light,
for the world is no easy place, and the world is often cruel,
but there are some things that are out there that are worth the awesome fight,
more rare than gold or silver, more valuble than a jewel,
and it's obvious to those with a profound sense of right,
that these rarest of the rare things are worth fighting a duel,
for just the merest glimpse, the most quicksilver sight.

There are some things among these lands of debauchery and loss,
that shine bright and beckon to the bravest of the brave,
these are the things that glow with an unbearable gloss,
these things that the greediest of the greedy men crave,
and all evil men try to get them in their paws,
while good men defend them against the hell sent knave,
who desires to deliver them to his firey boss,
after sending those who hold them into an unwarranted grave.

For they are the strong holds against the enroaching dark,
for they are the things that hold back the ever approaching black,
and they are the things that fly above us like a lark,
and those who hold them never feel a single lack,
for they hover above bereft of the smallest black mark,
and guard their owners from a hell driven knife into the back,
and you can hear the hellhounds pursue with their infernal bark,
and the demons trying to steal them through guile and tact,

but they will never leave those that hold them all alone,
but they will never give cause for a despairing groan,
and even once we lie cold and dark below the grassy knoll,
we will live on in paradise through the power of the soul.

Everybody has a soul, at least in the beginning. Through our actions and our deeds, the soul can grow strong and proud, or shriveled and weak. Still, we all have one, burning inside us like the sun. The darkness would like nothing more than to consume that never ending light and transform us into the lifeless monsters you can see every day on the news. YOU CANNOT LET THEM. Self loathing is the devil's tool which he uses to drive those who could shine like the brightest star into the blackest hell. However, it is only an illusion, which can be banished with a sight of the light. Whoever, wherever you are, know this; somewhere, somebody loves you. Guaranteed. _I_ love you. With the knowledge that someone loves you, how can you do other than love yourself?

Sand

sand
in my hand
in my shoes
on my toes
on my clothes
on my skin
in
the way i feel
about the real
deal
between you
and i
and i cry
when i try
to understand why
it all falls through
my hand
like so much
so much sand

One and three I've had for a while, probably a month or two.
Two I did write just the other day, but they may have
received a slight tweak here and there for my mood
while I typed 'em. I must say,

I have too much free time
poetry coming outta my ears
(which is a funny sight)
a nice place to trade rhymes
and share fears,
(also a fun[ny] site)
and droopy eyelids ready for a nap
so I can get up early and work hard...
nah never mind, forget that,
methinks I shall sleep in
like I usually do,
until the clock rings
and I shout
Who the hell turned that damn thing on?!
Oh,yah, 'twas me
What'd I do that for,
how am I s'posed to sleep
with that damned clock going beep-beep-beep!

I need a tagline that succinctly states
"This poem just fell outta mind head."
Well, I'll be damned...

Tessa Rose (21/02/01)

I'm no good at one night stands
I'm sick of playing games
I'm tired of running scared
And wondering who's to blame

I want someone who'll be my friend
Someone I can trust
But all I ever seem to find
Are women driven by booze and lust

And then you came along
We met in the most unlikely place
But I could not deny the smile
That so lights up your face

You were suspicious of me at first
As I was of you
And when you didn't call
I feared that it was true

That everything you'd told me
Was just some flattering line
Prerehearsed and insincere
Just words to pass the time

But then we met again
And you told me how you felt
To my surprise I dared to believe it
And I thought my heart would melt

So now I sit, listless
On the train that takes me home
Somewhat hopeful that you could be the one
Somewhat scared that you won't phone.

How can any peace be found, amidst the concrete and steel
A haze or grey that fills the sky, reminders of the lost
The innocents and fallen heroes, much too high a cost.
And the three brave men that raised our flag, atop the massive grave
You showed us spirit and gave us hope, your heart and soul you gave.
And the Queen she played our Anthem, not a dry eye could be found,
As we search for closure of loved ones gone,
We know that life must carry on.
So many faces, the same blank gaze,
Our lives now changed in many ways
The hockey game was cancelled as they bowed their heads to pray
Their hearts were filled sorrow, the coach could not resume the play.
They were ordinary people, living ordinary lives,
They were minding their own business, they didn't have to die.
Hiding like a coward in his bunker underground
It's his people that will pay the price,
His conscience can't be found.
I wonder if his God will be forgiving when it comes to Judgement Day
That day is coming soon my friends, I heard the battle cry today.

Project

The words flow, yet not again,
Things fly far apart,
I don't know where to begin,
That's a start.
The flying noise,
And then a crash.
A flying nun?
Strapped for cash.
Watching money fly from my hands,
Into the task
Out of the way
I'm at loss, who to ask?

All the bad things
All the bad in my head

You can make them all
You can make them go away

You can shine a light
And, baby, I'll follow you

You make me believe
Believe that I can make it through

All the bad things
All the bad in my head

You can make them all
You can make them go away

Chaos,

Don’t point that gun at me.
And will you people in the back, stop cheering him on.
I’m defenceless all I’ve got is this little sacrificial doll,
What now you call me a Troll?

I pull out my Sword in an attempt to defend myself,
Wahh!! Where did you lot spring up from!
I could use some help here.
Oh you’re staying quiet so they don’t get you?
Well maybe if you came from your hiding places
We would maybe stand a chance.

Aww nuts… now more people are watching and I look the Bad guy.
Ahh well may as well go down fighting.
AIIIEEEEEAHHH!!!!
Ok maybe that wasn’t the best of plans…
Can we all just forget about this?
I was doing a swell job of passing you by before
Can’t we go back to ignoring each other.

Warning: Thise poem has an unusually low sillines value!

This poem I write
without power
or greed

This poem I write,
its like planting a seed.

In depths galore,
in hights supreme.
It cometh, like a dream.

Its not like day,
its not like night,
But still, it is shining bright.

Shining bright indeed

Summertime

 summer, summer, summertime
time to sit back and unwind

Here it is the groove slightly transformed
just a bit of a break from the norm
just a little somethin' to break the monotony
of all that hardcore dance that has gotten to be
a little bit out of control it's cool to dance
but what about the groove that soothes that moves romance
give me a soft subtle mix
and if ain't broke then don't try to fix it
and think of the summers of the past
adjust the base and let the alpine blast
pop in my CD and let me run a rhyme
and put your car on cruise and lay back cause this is summertime

summer, summer, summertime
time to sit back and unwind

school is out and it's a sort of a buzz
a back then I didn't really know what it was
but now I see what have of this
the way that people respond to summer madness
the weather is hot and girls are dressing less
and checking out the fellas to tell 'em who's best
riding around in your jeep or your benzos
or in your Nissan stting on lorenzos
back in Philly we be ou in the park
a place called the plateau is where everybody goes
guys out hunting and girls doing likewise
honking at the honey in front of you with the light eyes
she turn around to see what you beeping at
it's like the summers a natural afradesiac
and with a pen and pad I compose this rhyme
to hit you and get you equipped for the summer time

summer, summer, summertime
time to sit back and unwind

it's late in the day and I ain't been on the court yet
hustle to the mall to get me a short set
yeah I got on sneaks but I need a new pair
cause basketball courts in the summer got girls there
the temperature's about 88
hop in the water plug just for old times sake
break to ya crib change your clothes once more
cause you're invited to a barbeque that's starting at 4
sitting with your friends cause y'all remincise
about the days growing up and the first person you kiss
and as I think back makes me wonder how
the smell from a grill could spark up nostalgia
all the kids playing out front
little boys messin round with the girls playing double-dutch
while the DJ's spinning a tune as the old folks dance at your family
reunion
then six o'clock rolls around
you just finished wiping your car down
it's time to cruise so you head to the summertime hangout
it looks like a car show
everybody come lookin real fine
fresh from the barber shop or fly from the beauty salon
every moment frontin and maxin
chillin in the car they spent all day waxin
leanin to the side but you can't spead through
Two miles an hour so everybody sees you
there's an air of love and of happiness
and this is the Fresh Prince's new defintion of summer madness

summer, summer, summertime
time to sit back and unwind

June, Upriver

Hot night, flicker streetlight
and fade.

The caress of a humid river evening
among its sisters arrayed,

by passage of time this starless flight
sits lonesome but not mislaid.

Summer still writes a letter of remembrance,
suffocating in its sweetness

She concealed we two in our furtive stroll.
Lovers in mind, daring no completeness.

Round the pond we wandered,
pressing close, murmuring our hearts.

No dusky idyll this, the dripdrop of sweat from our noses,
fierce stings of mosquitoes, no prick of roses

Only awkward memories, in countless little carts.

Tell me now, chili pepper,
Did you treasure those false starts?

Trembling,
I close my eyes
Hiding a silent plea.
A yearning,
An obsession.
To taste your kiss,
A craving so strong
I sigh.

Your touch, tender
Upon my skin,
Caress me
Love me.
Soothe my soul.
A kiss,
A drug,
Potent,
So sweet

I cry.

K.A.Stryker


Ever and always
Me

Sand

The lawless dust of land.
Its blows in dunes, it moves like snow.
It flies around, the desert land.
It zips away, from open hand.
It flies around, to foregin man.
It thwirls about forever glad.
It thwirls about, never sad.
Around mankinds ruins.
around desert bones.
All around us, there it blows.
We can do naught, but gasp in awe.
For sand is of eternal age.
From the moutains, to the seas,
Sand will forever, haunt thee.
yes, sand and stone and rock alike,
Forever dwindling to winds might.
Forever voyaging, into open dreams.
Forever moving, time. It seams.
The sands go by
as ages pass.
The sands go by
In ages lost.
The sands are there, forever, mind.
The sands are there, so be so kind.
To let it flow, to let it go, watch the ever mighty flow.
Take your heed, and kneel in awe,
Sand will surely, fill your grave.
Sand will seeth, to open heart.
Sand will see, what stops a dart.
Sand will never go away, as long as mighty moutains stay.
In the Eternal winds they blow,
and now this poet must go go go.
To end the poem, yet with grace,
Heres a final escapade.
Sand in your hair.
Sand in your feet.
Your probably standing, at the beach.

Cheers from Alderach! Poetry Bastard and Loving it!
Sweden 2002 Jan 6 at: 03.44 (sunday morning)

I Stand Alone 19/02/01

I'm sick of all the knock-backs,
The devastation and the lies
My shattered dreams embody
Every thing that I dispise

I no longer have the strength,
The courage or the will
As the faster that I run the more
It seems like I'm standing still

So I will put away my dancing shoes
And dismiss this awesome band
From now I walk this road alone
And alone, forever I will stand

In matters of the heart I've always
Tried to fight the good fight
But I've been kicked in the teeth so often
That you know it isn't right

If I ever met the madman who said
That hope springs eternally
I'd tell him a tale to bring him
Begging to his knees

A bachelor's life is certainly
Not what I had planned
But from now I walk this road alone
And alone forever, I will stand

At last I know I'm defeated
As I stare at this empty cup
I've fallen once too often
And I cannot seem to get back up

So feel free to laugh at me
Or point at me and stare
You'll get no reaction here
I simply no longer care

Once I thought I always would
Offer my heart and hand
But from now I walk this road alone
And alone, I ever will stand

Chocolate
So good to me.
Chocolate
So good for tea.
Chocolate
Its a movie to.
Chocolate
Not scooby doo.
Chocolate
Its in my hair!
Chocolate
Right over there.
Chocolate
Will you eat with me?
Chocolate
Costs a dime.
Chocolate
You have the time.
Chocolate
Good as gifts.
Chocolate
Good for kicks.
Chocolate
Anytime.
Chocolate
Its all mine.

the light in your soul can never die,
and only you can dim it,
love can brighten it,
love can dim it
but the spark is always there.

life can be a dance,
or life can be a fight
but life is never flat
the world is yours
you've just got to grab it and you'll see

love can come in many a strange form,
but if you have your true love you will know
pain is shared,
joy is too
but true love can only start
with you.

For the uniformed; I have been charging everyone exorbant fees to talk to Buffy. I don't know why or how; I just have. This poem is based on that.

Happy Birthday Buffy,
I'm afraid I'm a day late,
and I must apologize,
for forcing you to wait.

And now I will quote,
without further ado,
This poem that I wrote,
especially for you.

One day, sometime during last week,
I decided to go for a walk,
and other Unwashed I would seek,
because I wanted to talk,
and so I went about the town,
and everyone I met wore a frown.
and everyone looked really down,
in the village that is Unwashed.

So I walked about and begin to inquire,
what had made everyone sad,
surely things could not be that dire,
come on, perk up, be glad!
and the people, well, they said to me,
if you want to know, then you will see,
our awesome debilating sadness's key,
is your terrible, awful, horrible fee!

We cannot afford to talk to her!
You charge to much! It is not fair!
You loathsome snivelling whining cur!
We can't believe that you would dare,
to charge us to talk to our favorite nurse,
if it's bad now, it will get worse,
and then they threatened, with words that were terse,
to beat me with a lead filled purse!

Okay! Okay! You'll get your way!
I yelled, to avoid the beating,
but only for a single day!
That's the only demand I'm meeting!
And so, because I'm a nice guy,
my generousness would make you cry,
and I swear I do not lie,
you can talk to Buffy for free *sigh*

But only on her birthday.

Well, I've seen one translation,
And you may be right. 
If you are I might consider a name change,
It's given me a fright.
Tho, giving birth to gods,
And lots of trolls,
Is something that is interesting,
The virtues I can't extoll.
It is kinda interesting,
In a peverse kind of way.
But this is all new to me,
I've only heard this translation today.                                                    

I liked the name because in my book,
He was a giant formed from ice,
And sparks drawn for the fire, 
Opposite elements - how nice.
Then from Ymir's body,
The gods made the universe.
In addition, it means "noisemaker",
When translated from old verse.                                                    

The drinking from the big ol' cow,
And the other stuff,
Is something I'd not heard before,
But, hey, that's life, it's tough.
I'm far too old and decrpit,
To go changing my name now,
At least it was a bovine,
And not a big ol' sow!                                                    

Cheers from the Land of Oz

Sand

Soft beneath my feet as I walk,
Hissing grain on grain,
Whispering ghosts of forms past.
Time and tide prevail,
Returning fire's rocky child
To the dust of the stars.
Echoes of a million waves,
Surfdancing stone to sand.

06/1/02

Untitled

Dressed to the nines
In my top hat and tails
Going out for good times
Not just a bed of nails

So keep it in your pants
As I turn up the charm
But can I have this dance?
Can I hold you in my arms?

It's too hard to tell
As I cruise this scene
Is this heaven or hell
Or is it just a dream?

So where would you go
To meet Miss Right?
To take things slow
To have more than just one night

I'll take the good with the bad
I'll take a little pain
And when I'm feeling sad
You can lift me up again

If you want what I've got
I'm gonna raise the stakes
Can you go the distance?
Have you got what it takes?

Will you go out on a limb
And offer me your heart?
It's something I need to know
Before we can start

This bed may be empty
But this much I know
It will be ten times worse
If you stay, only to go.

Emotional Suicide

Your lonliness is obvious
In the wasted tears that you cry
For a long forgotten lover
From years gone by

You lie to yourself
You dream and you pretend
That one day it will all be over
That your misery will end

Yet you cannot help yourself
You relive all the pain
And the scars on your broken heart
Are driving you insane

You don't learn from your mistakes
There's no one else to blame
Each time you pray for better
But it all turns out the same

Another lover leaves you
The same worn out routine
Another scar is all you get
For trying to live the dream

You know that it's no good for you
Yet you cannot run and hide
Some day it will get ahead of you
It's emotional suicide

Your persistance would be admirable
If it wasn't all in vain
But you're just blind and stubborn
A glutton for all this pain

You lie awake at night
You cry yourself to sleep
Because you cannot show the world
Those scars that run so deep

You put on such a front
You're all smiles in the public eye
Hoping to convince yourself
That it isn't all a lie

But hope is hardest to retain
After everything you've tried
It seems the only way out of this
Is emotional suicide.

The mourning after

As we bow our heads in silent prayer
let us give thanks to those that are there
Donating blood or giving a hand
All because someone has soiled our land.

Innocent lives taken for someone else's fight
Now we're not sleeping too well at night.
For we have many loved ones and friends we hold dear
They could not escape, they were just too near.

They trained to fight fires and help those that are hurt
If you'd have asked either one, they'd have given their shirt.
Paul and Brian, so young, full of life
You leave behind two children and wives.

I've lit many candles and said many prayers
How can we find peace in a rockets red glare?
The people that did this will pay with their lives
No doubt in my mind, that it won't be with knives!

Their plan was so clever, thought out and planned
They forgot one thing..
Divided we fall, United we stand!
We will not take this lying down, give a slap on the wrist?
The American public wants war, we are pissed!

Their women and children dance in the streets
Our women and children now have blood on their feet
The answers we seek are many days ahead
Still sifting through rubble, the broken and dead.


I think it goes without saying that many of us lost people that
were dear to us yesterday. This was without a doubt the hardest
poem I ever wrote. Two friends of mine were firemen that were
sent to the towers. I'll keep praying for a miracle though, it's all
I can do right now.

Kids don't try this at home...

 Run out the door
Into the hall
To pound the floor
And bounce off walls
Problem is this mind
It wants to move
A million miles an hour
In a hyperactive euphoric groove
Mmmmmm just one more hit of power
Try so hard to stay so high
As through dark halls I'm winding
Can't hear my lies or alibis
Nor the sounds of my gears grinding.

“Echoes”

There’s an echo in my soul
I feel hollow inside
I try to hide it from your eyes
But my face never lies
I fear things have gone awry

And yet there is hope
Something to help me cope
A light not bound by its rope

Cause the time I spent with you
Echoes through it all.

"Child"

It was just one little hit
because she'd had too much fun,
but then she ran away crying,
and my child's pain had begun.

This is a parent's love.
It is the wounds we keep so deep
that are finally set free
to trouble our child's sleep.

That was the 1st hit
and now this vicious cycle has begun
my child had once been so happy
but now the happiness is gone.

I never knew why I hit her
why I wanted to see her hurt,
but I couldn't stop the madness,
not even when I ripped her favorite shirt.

Each time I hit her, and she ran into her room,
I would sit there and cry
and tell myself
"Baby, this is the end. I promise I'll try."

But with each new hit
I was further away from recovery.
I wish I could hold her again,
just to hold her close to me.

My beautiful baby is now so sad,
all her happiness is gone
and all I can do is whisper through my tears,
"Lord, what have I become?"

Small

Dusk in the hammock
turned toward the river

thinking of you,
I shiver

I am child small, smell the approach of rain
thunder's boom, like a fallen plane

uncertain wind, massive drops
the flash, the crack, my clothing sops;

I count and count, to estimate distance,
wondering with an anxious "for instance,"

But your headlights shine bright with coming back, black tires roll on, crushing drive gravel.

I no longer mind the arc and report,
nor the pound of the gavel;

in your hurried hands,
the housekeys,
and my heart

I run to you on long wet grass,
an instant's travel,

to our dinnertime, your loving arms.

Street

The street does not care
do we think it watches us with contepmt?
dont we see it is not there?
it is just a street

The street can not abuse us
the way others can abuse us, and the street

The street does not try to lead
that was the people who built it
and we led them, with our need
there's nobody here but us

The street leads from places
just as well as it goes to them, it has no preference

The street is not afraid of death
and it never thought of a god
even if they made it run through cess
the street never complains.

Volatile

You want something from me?
Come back another time
I'm mad as hell can't you see?
So get your face out of mine

I don't want to hear
Whatever you've got to say
I won't shed a tear
Won't you just go away

I heard you want a fight
You're a real tough dude
But you're going down tonight
'Cause now I'm in the mood

Adrenaline's pumping
Anger runs free
Let me tell you something
You'd better let me be
I won't be misconstrued
See right through my smile
You know I'm in the mood
You know I'm volatile!

If you like your face
The way it is
Give me some space
Do you get my gist?

If you feel lucky today
Then go on and try
If it isn't your day
Then you're gonna die

You know you've got
An ugly attitude
But don't think you're hot
'Cause now I'm in the mood!

Adrenaline's pumping
Anger runs free
Let me tell you something
You'd better let me be
I won't be misconstrued
See right through my smile
You know I'm in the mood
You know I'm volatile!

Just back down bud
And you'll be fine
'Cause there's gonna be blood
And it won't be mine

Don't think you're right
Don't get in my way
'Cause then we'll fight
And then you'll pay

You talk too tough
And you're just being rude
I think you've said enough
'Cause now I'm in the mood!

Adrenaline's pumping
Anger runs free
Let me tell you something
You'd better let me be
I won't be misconstrued
See right through my smile
You know I'm in the mood
You know I'm volatile!

Poem: Unspoken Words

Where are you when I need you
You said you'd help me through
I'm broken down, flat busted
and I don't know what to do.

I kow that it was long ago
and Oh so far away
But the thought of you still haunts me
Theres so much I need to say

When I tried to say I'm sorry
It fell upon deaf ears
You cannot hear me crying....
A cascade of silent tears

The stories told were brilliant
cause I didn't have a clue
The stage was set, the role was played
What I newver saw was you

I do not have a name for you
Just know you're always there
I hear your whispers in the dark
They tell me you don't care.

Fictitious names and faces
Each one, it's own cruel twist
You didn't even blink and eye
The night I was dismissed

Your slate now clean, you've started fresh
Tell me, who's your prey today..
Does she really care like I did,
Or is it your turn to be played?

If only

If I could catch you, baby
If I could catch you when you're falling slow

If I could hold you, baby
If I could hold you and never let you go

It'd be right
It'd all be right
If only I could hold you
Hold you impossibly tight

If I could reach you, baby
If I could reach you when you're away

If I could touch you, baby
If I could touch you anytime of day

It'd be fine
It'd all be fine
If only I could touch you
Touch you like you're mine

Oz-ite, I read your verse
I catch your point
but what is worse
I am in total assent
but on one I oin't                

To each their own
I think you said
except Pk's are the stone
through my plate glass,
They wish me very dead                

they arent each-ing their own
they're bleach-ing my bones
uninvited, don't you see?                

That's the exception
Otherwise warm reception
from innocent ones such as we                

This rhyme schemes all haywire
it doesn't make much sense
Please don't raise your bastard ire
and leave off compliments                

er...where was I?                

oh yes, talking to that birch tree over there...

"In Commemoration of Sleep"

When i cling to my sleep,
I cling to my dreams
To the ones that shine like crystals
That gleam like dragonsteeth
In my mind

When i wake screaming from sleep,
I cling to my bed
To my pillow or dragon or anything
That reminds me of safety
In my mind

I do not always wake desiring
To stay forever in the realm of sleep
More often i wake crying,
Mourning the repetition of the nightmares
Streaming through my brain

I do not like nightmares
For i can taste them hours after
I am awake and walking the world again;
Their lingering makes me nervous,
Makes me melt like puddles

Oh, but when i wake screaming
Tearing at my own flesh,
My self-destruct button triggered again
I breathe. I realize that i am still alive,
And this knowledge helps me move again

Oh, but there are still days
When i find myself paralyzed with fear
I cannot swear that they will ever be
Completely gone. However, I do know
That i will sleep again.

I do not fear the sleep. I know
That all it is is sleep, that the images
that plague my mind are images, i know
for once in my life i am safe, i am alive,
i am truly almost alright

I do not fear this. I fear only that
The things i treasure in my life may turn out
To be only dreams that i would cling to,
Dreams that fade away an hour after they came to me
The ones that gleam like dragonsteeth

Bright shining stars in a wartorn mind.

Animals and sport!

(I wrote this at about 3am yesterday after a party, and it doesn't make much sense to me now, but I thought I'd post it anyway :P)
And please reply too :)
Cats are animals
Nice and cute
They newer dive,
or parachute

Ive newer seen
a dog, go bungee jump.
Ive newer seen a frog,
on tour the France.

No penguin has been
a tenis star.
But it all depends
On who you are.

No bear ive seen
Has played cricket twise
No bear ive seen
Has ever played on ice.

No Turtels who play
Basketball
And snakes dont
go skate board.

First Kiss
I shudder,
Closing my eyes
Hiding a silent plea.
A yearning
A need
For you.
To taste your kiss.
A craving
So strong
I sigh.
A tender touch upon my skin.
Caress me
Stroke me
Soothe my soul.
A kiss
A drug
Potent
So sweet
I cry.

k.a.stryker 2000


Ever and always
Me

The Street

Unforgiving and all-encompassing
Lives are thrown into it and collated for the grand scheme
Like a performer pushed in front of his crowd,
A little uneasy but all too comfortable

The street will take you to where you want to go.
It is the pathway to your every desire,
You need only state your payment.

Flying high and looking low,
One will inevitably find The Street,
Filled to capacity with souls-searching
And finding….in one way or another.

Thank You And Goodnight

So unsure of what I know
I'm too afraid to sing
These verses I write to describe
The hopes to which I cling

So eager am I to hear your voice
Your silence fills me with doubt
Now that I've fallen so far for you
I cannot find my way back out

So once again I take the fall
I take it on the chin
What they say about nice guys is true
You know we never win

I cannot blame you for my foolish thoughts
Just because I wasn't right
In hoping that we could have had more
Than lust in the heat of the night

The memory of what we had
The thought of what might be
Masked so well the bitterness
Of the truth I couldn't see

When I was alone the dream of you
Restored my faith and hope
My only defence against lonliness
Though unaware, you helped me cope

For that I'd like to thank you
And make sure you realise
How good it felt to see the love I saw
When I looked into your eyes

However my vision must have been impared
Though I thought that's what I saw
It must have been just that dream
Of which I spoke before

Now your apathy towards my presence
Has shown me what is real
Your silence tells me more than words
Exactly how you feel

Regretfully I must leave once more
With a heavy, wounded heart
There is little joy behind my smile
This time as I depart

Now all I have to offer you
As I say this last goodbye
Are my apologies and my gratitude
And a teary sigh.

Upon reading this thread
I've seen from the replies
There are many among us
That have unzipped their flies.

Poor Sylvin nearly fainted
At the sight of Gregs bat
Such wild imaginations
I think they've gone daft

But alas, the elders tried not to offend
"It will grow, do not worry, my pubescent friends"
When such questions arise,we try to be serious
Now Greg has a button, because he's delirious.

Turjan likes candy, for he has a Mounds
Sysman says Twix... how funny that sounds!
So many displays, of chocolate candy
In bite size too...Oh my, that is handy.

Morbius got carried away with inuendo toward Sylvin
He's been zapped with the wand, he's the size of a pin.
If only he'd waited, his body would have caught up
Now he sits in the corner, like a poor wounded pup.

They've all got their tape measures
or rulers if you may...
Weasel had a yard stick..
"Oh please, put that away!"

The Owls says that he has had no complaints
Max is above average..
They all swoon and faint.

You guys just don't get it
Size makes no matter
Given choices of a bat or a mounds,
I believe we'd choose the latter.

Red Hands

They wash themselves...
Furiously trying to clean...
The red stains...
From the carpet floor...
These red hands...
Wipe themselves...
Across the walls...
Leaving trails behind...
And the liquid...
Falls back onto the carpet...
These red hands...
Ball into fists...
And punch the wall...
More red liquid flies...
Nothing to release this pain...
These red hands...
Wipe my face...
Leaving trails behind...
And the liquid...
Drips down my arms...
These can't be my hands...
I've worked too hard...
To stop this pain...
These red hands...
Fall onto the floor...
These red hands...
Are my own...

Have you ever felt another mind?,
ever touched someones soul with your's?
have you ever felt the things they felt?
Ever known their point of veiw?

Have you ever kissed a girl without even touching?
Both feeling the same warm non-embrace.
Have you ever broken down and cried,
just because you felt anothers pain?

have you even laughed at a joke you've never heard before?
Ever ignored a warning in your dreams?
Ever seen death but didn't stop it?
ever wished you belived in the power of the mind,
before it was too late?

Ever felt responsable for a loss of life you may have forseen?
Had the knowledge to stop it but didn't?
Have you ever tried to destroy your gift?
Only to make it stronger?

ever tried to block out the noise of everone else mind?
ever lay awake at night because you room-mate was dreaming too loud?

And have you ever almost killed yourself just to make it stop....

I'm pleased to make you aquaintance, Goose,
We always welcome those new,
I have read some of you recent posts,
And I would like to welcome you.
You mentioned earlier about your rank,
With no interest in moving on,
Well, there is no formal rank structure here,
Anything approximating that is gone.
Yes, there are some senior members,
But they are special you see,
They are the founding members,
Or hard workers theydo  be.
Take for example Buffy and Doom,
Both fairly new to this game,
They have worked tirelessly here,
The Village has not been the same.
We are surrounded by hard working types,
And those who just like to be,
Involved in something interesting,
And full of jocularity.
You'll find that you've got avarian company,
And before you start to school,
Already amongst our feathered friends,
We boast a type of Night Owl.                                                    

It is my duty to inform you now,
That now us you did pick,
You will neeed to get a visit from Doom, 
And The Pointy Stick.
The Pointy Stick is an Unwashed tradition,
Exercised on those so new,
It will be over in a flash,
No scars will be left on you.
So, I welcome you once again,
The party has just begun,
I hope that your is experience is enjoyable,
Exciting and even fun.                                                    

Cheers from the Land of Oz

If I were a street, though, where would I lead from?

Still I would not be paved
Can I still have the trappings?
The facade that fools me too?

Perhaps cobblw stone
to make me feel special
with my decadent guests

Or soft sand and pebbles
stealing my style from the beach I visit
where the people have fun

I would lead to happy places
but also back to the drear
which in in most lives

I'd follow the noisy stream
which would tell me of its adventures
And Id tell myself I am happy not to move

I lead to a place, then back again
It is all a street can do
some pity me for this fact

But it is what ive learned to know
my place in the world i cannot choose
an ordinary thing personified.

Sweet Dreams

When I look into your eyes
Everything I see
Says that the way I feel about you
Is how you feel about me

I want to call it love
But I'm not sure if that's right
Just be assured you're not out of mind
Even though you're out of sight

I ask myself what we've got
And this is all I know
It's just too easy to hold you close
And too damn hard to let you go

When I recover from your caress
And its sweet temptation
I can see that my kiss
Leaves you with a similar sensation

While I may have fallen for you
And your subtle charms
I see the way you look at me
When I hold you in my arms

I see my desire to be close
Reflected in your stare
I see a passion so urgent that
It's almost more than we can bare

Words cannot describe
The feelings in my heart
Whenever I hold you close
Or the regret when we must part

I don't know how you did this to me
What you did or what you said
But I can no longer lie down at night
Without wishing you shared my bed

Yet you seem so far away
That all that I can do
Is remember our time together
Then sleep, and dream of you.

A Poem for Paladin...

You've touched me deeply
My heart and soul
I hold you so dear
You've a heart made of gold

When yesterday you left
Tears rolled down my face
It was so good to know
You were in a safe place

But you had to return
To the place you call home
You're mom, she missed you
Didn't want you to roam.

Just once in this lifetime
A friend like you appears
Keeping us mentally intact
Sharing laughter and tears.

I can't begin to explain
How much you mean to me
Running through my veins
Like water to the sea

To say "Thank You" for all
Just would not do
I love you my friend
And that friend Neil is you.

*Hugs* I miss you already!

I am the creator. And I created this life.
But it is truly no life. No life at all.
It’s all an illusion, but no illusion.
It’s a delusion baby, a delusion of mediocrity.

For the truth comes by and then it leaves me,
The lies they fill, fill and complete me.
And the truth will come but it won’t stay,
The lies what keeps the dark away.

The darkness is truth, there’s truth in the darkness.
But there is no truth. No truth at all.
It’s all a lie, but not a lie.
It is nothing, I’m nothing at all.

For the truth comes by and then it leaves me,
The lies they fill, fill and complete me.
And the truth will come but it won’t sta-ay,
The lies what keeps the dark away.

And the night falls down, it creeps o-ver.
It is dark but there is light, there is no darkness, none at all.
It blinds me baby, but it lets me see.
I am the truth, the all, the me.

I created this life and now I live it,
Why do these dreams have to be so vivid?
But it’s not a dream, no dream at all.
This is the life I live but I don’t want it,
Why does my mind feel so haunted,
Why does my reality seem a dream,
Why can’t my dream be my reality.
I created this life and now I live it,
Why do these dreams have to be so vivid,
But it’s not a dream, no dream at all,
And this is me, that’s me that’s all.

this just came to me as a song, but since it's a little hard considering I don't play an instrument ( well I used to play sax ) and I can't sing anymore ( damn puberty, hehehe) so just imagine it.

8^D

We were talking late that night
Just you and I alone
Your day wasn't all that good I hear
Through the sobbing and the moans

I tried my best to help you out
It was only a warning sign
Little did I know that you
Had your life upon the line

The talk we had ended far beyond
the length of time we talk for
You hung up quick and blocked me out
yet I yearn to talk some more

I went to a party the following night
My problems I did forget
That was until I got the news
the timer had been set

I raced as fast as I could
To see by best all time mate
I found you in a quivering heap
I'm afraid I was too late

Soon after the others arrived
Hurried to our sides
Bit by bit your life ebbed away
Ebbed just like the tides

I held onto you tightly
my grip I would not release
You opens your eyes and muttered
That for once you would have peace

My grip got even tighter
Tears rolled down my cheeks
I was blind not to see at all
What you had experienced these past few weeks

I released my grip as
a soft hand brushed my face
I put you upon your bed as
the chemicals ran their race

I asked to be alone with you
My friends were persistent
Finally they got to leave
And you were getting distant

I sat beside you and looked at you
Asked you why you had done this
Your strength was fleeting but
you had enough to move in for a kiss

I could stop the tears now
Nor could you if we tried
you said it would be easier on us
on yourself if you died

I pressed my forehead against your own
our embrace was soft like goo
Over and over I said to myself
"This just cannot be true"

Pure whiteness surrounds you now
In coffin and in flower
I'll miss you now my dearest friend
My life has just turned sour

I thought about it every night
Since I lost you in my arms
I reached for you all through that time
like leaves upon the palms

Since then the times I have grabbed knives
I've found them pointed toward my chest
My friends and yours stopped me every time
Like you I wanted rest

The past no longer matters now
I'm here and you are dead
It will stay with me throughout my life
Everything that you said

As I leave I turn again
To gaze upon your corpse
You said you'd attend my funeral
We had laughed about it in our talks

My friends are here, they comfort me
I am beginning my life anew
No matter what I think or say
I will always be missing you

Sorry about the punctuation, but I'm not really that happy right now...

I wait in the night for the stars to come out,
not really sure what it's all about,
I wait in the night for the stars to come out,
And all that I feel within me is doubt,
I wait in the night for the stars to come out,
but then I can't help but let out a shout,
of pain, of loss, of the absence of light,
in the cold, dark night.

I lie on my back and I stare at the moon,
the light that it casts is a tremendous boon,
I lie on my back and I stare at the moon,
I'm getting tired, I should go to bed soon,
I lie on my back and I stare at the mooon,
and all of my neighbors think I am a loon,
when I scream out my pain and my sorrow,
and wait for the light of tomorrow.

I wait in the night and I scan the skies,
and something deep down within me dies,
I wait in the night and I scan the skies,
and the words of hope on my lips are lies,
I wait in the night and I scan the skies,
and fill the darkness with my lamenting cries,
for the only light in the enroaching gloom,
is the moon, and soon, it will meet it's doom.

For there are no stars shining brightly above,
there are no signs of an enfolding love,
for there are no stars shining brightly above,
there are no bright pinpoints for bards to sing of,
for there are no stars shining brightly above,
only smog, which can sour the white of a dove,
so I howl of my loss to the polluted air,
and hope that someday my supplanters will dare,
to love, to hope, to show that they care,
to the planet which has had the burden to bear,
to the world the humanity has made it's lair,
to our earth, which once was so shining and fair,

and now only reeks of destruction.

Love Poem

from the depps of my mind, to all of youre eyes, i hope thise is nothing you despice! (sigh, even my intros are in poem form! :)
 Chickens, are yellow
Cats are blue
Im so in love with you

Dogs bark.
Birds flap.
Im in love with you and youre cat

Fish swim.
Cows moo.
But, i am still in love with you.

Kangaroes jump.
Ducks quack.
I fell in love with you like that.

I Know dogs bark,
I know fish swim,
I am just a bit dim,
And I know why, o yes,
i do.

It is because, im mandly
in love
with you!

Streets

I watch things burn on the street
I am so l337
Fire can't be beat
Now lets all have pixie stix to eat

I walk along the path with you
From a distance, keeping watch
Bruised and with a broken heart
You've seen way to much

I've seen the painted secrets
But what lies beneath shone through
Theres no visions of the future
I'm not sure what to do.

The confusion that surrounds you
Keeps me in a spin
What if this spirals out of control?
Would that not be a sin?

I don't have all the answers,
but the questions multiply.
Thought my eyes were open,
Must have closed them when I cried.

Numbed with feeling I can't explain
I've tried to comfort, ease your pain
But I can see your silent tears
As they fall down like rain.

The path, it is divided now
I'm not sure where to go.
The right side shows me loneliness
The other, heaven knows....

I have no idea where this one came from. I just started typing and this was the end result...

You-Tu

You are you
not me
but you.
look in the mirror
peek-a-boo
the face that you see
Isn't me-
It's you.

New Horizons-Poem for a friend

A firestorm of emotion
In those eyes so blue
You're path it was not chosen,
but set out for you.

One so young, so wild, untamed
Yet still you in shadows you hide...
Left beaten down and broken,
Feeling part of you has died.

So very aware of what life can hold
You search for loves true meaning
You may be young, but not naive
This is your time for healing.

Go on with things, as once before
Do not dwell on the past
A new horizon waits for you
Don't try to live so fast.


*Hugs*
Hope this makes things a little better. Thanks for cheering me up when I needed it

Luff ya
Tink

Undone

Looking back from a distance
I can plainly see
You sought out simple pleasures
That would not come easy to me
I have bent until I'm broken
Still your eyes are open wide shut
It took awhile to find a voice
To speak to one so fine
Whats the matter baby, my face don't always shine....
You ask of me what no man has
I cannot come to grips
You had what you wanted all along,
Always at your fingertips.
Perhaps it wasn't disrespect
Just different points of view
But now I've gotta ask
What do I mean to you?
I've loved you from afar, so long...
And yes I know it's wrong
I know that I can't have you
and I've run out of room to run
So say Good bye is what I must do
Before I'm totally undone.

Distance

It's the distance between us
That creeps into my mind
It's the distance between us
That creeps into my mind
And the further you are
The harder you are to find

I don't understand
I reach out with my hand
And touch where she should be
But it's empty

It's the distance between us
That creeps into my mind
It's the distance between us
That creeps into my mind
And the further you are
The harder you are to find

no text just a question of sanity

... well ... maybe some text ... 
apon an open sky he looked up and wondered why, 
eagerly he he looked apon the ground, 
he felt down, 
he needed something to give him a lift 
so he looked up again to the sky, 
this time he did not wonder why, 
he only questioned "Do or Die ?", 
he answered his own question, 
it was a simple answer, 
a swooshing of air, 
as he fell down, down, down ..., 
the poor, poor dancer

Now the poem...inspired my Karate Goldfish. *hugs*
I liked the idea, so I tried it...hope you like it...
Oh, it's very off the cuff...


I search for words that describe me.
Who I think I am,
Who I want for you to see.
My hair is brown.
My eyes are brown.
Though I put blonde streaks in my hair,
And my eyes sometimes turn red.
I am short,
Petite,
Small.
I have no real talents,
Though I love to try new things.
I play baseball; I am new at it.
My legs and hands are bruised.
I look ten years younger than my age.
I love sushi.
I love chocolate.
Needles make me faint.
Puppies make me smile.
I am a mother.
I am a wife.
I am me.
K.A.Stryker


thanks

Ever and always
Me

Streets

In silent neon of the street,
The dusty air of winter heat,
Redundant thoughts to either or -
Another line is washed ashore

A vacant buzz to fading fame
Some reconciled reluctant blame

Then drizzle and a star.
Again, you went to far.

Rewind.
Retry.
Redo.
Rely.

Release the blade and learn to fly.

A star. Arcane.

Rewind once more.

Take out the blade and wash ashore,
In silent neon of the street.
Consume the air. Absorb the heat.

Look now.

1
I
sift
through
different
shades
colors
pigments
of reality
trying my luck
at finding
a niche in
dimensionality
I find
different
shapes
covers
figments
of
subliminally
trying my best
to lose
a fortune in
insubstantiality.

2

You speak of things
I know nothing about
and that saddens me
And I think
Where will I be
if I don't release the demon
Inside of me,
not let him loose
but let him free,
not to rage
but to let him see
that he is not held
Against his will
but bound to me
By soulfire and
symphony,
And only when
I see the separation
of Demon and Me
will either be truly free.

3.

I am as
old as the
sunset,
as undying
as the sunrise,
as eternal
as the sky,
as sweet as
the summer rain,
as loyal as
the wind,
as passionate
as the earth,
as impulsive
as the fire,
as heartless
as the desert,
as cold as
winter's arms,
as quiet as
the wolf,
as swift as
the cougar,
As silent as
the kiss
you left me with
cold lips on my cheek
a half-hearted hug,
you wisp away
from the grasp
you've never been in,
the eyes you've never seen,
the heart you never cared for,
the lungs that helped you breath,
you walk away
silent as a breeze
ruffling my heart.

A Single Rose

I've made a few modifications to it and added a stanza, but essentially, it's the same poem. Enjoy. Oh, btw, I gave the inspiration for this one a rose last night (she still hasn't seen the poem though).

A single rose
To show I care
By way of thanks
For time we share

A single rose
Proof of the dream
So that you'll believe
What your eyes have seen

A single rose
A symbol and
A heart-felt gift
From a humble man

A single rose
With no regret
A reminder so
You don't forget

A single rose
Such silent charm
Like waking up
With you in my arms

A single rose
Beauty so true
But a fairer vision
Is one of you

A single rose
For memory's sake
Because I can't be there
When you wake

A single rose
Though I must take flight
Here's a single rose
To mark the night

The Keeper of My Dreams

I wish that I could be your fantasy
Every desire you've ever dreamed
If dreams were a reality
Then it's only me you would need
I feel the hunger within you
pent up like a fiery steed
Your eyes like black onyx,
That melt me to my soul
You're the keeper of my dreams
Oh no..I've lost control
So the next time that you look at me,
Please don't look that way
I can't lie to my broken spirit
My heart pried off my sleeve
I tried everything I could think of
Why am I so damn naive?
On a path of self destruction
I've walked these dreams with you
But it's mind games that you play
You're so unaware of my heart
Someday will never come....
I should have known that from the start.

"Some assorted poemses."

I've gotten back into writing things on y'know, really real paper, a lot lately. Here's some of the results.
"axium of comparison"

axium of comparison
like happy or sad
the ever present
"in or out" yes,
you need tiny tiny feet
to stand on the line
i guess you could say
i broke my toes trying
last known coordinates
stuck in quadrant III
a long fall down this dirty paper

(Note: A math class poem. An AoC is the line on a graph for an inequality that divides the plane into 2. Above the line is "greater than" and below the line is "lesser than". If you can think of the concept of different sized infinities, you'll note that the dividing (equal to) line is tiny in comparison to the subplanes.
Also, quadrant III is the bottom left square of the plane; All points are negative there.)

"Wilderness"

mountains, hills, valleys
rivers ran red
a world streaked across this skin.
for once,
it is only my own. yeah,
i got Mother Nature
fooled real good.

"Isolation (bubbles)"

your world is a soap bubble
light on the breeze,
shining swirl in an always sun
i touch it
and it shatters
into a thousand seconds of light
never to be mine.
never for me to hold.

"smooth skin"

sometimes i think
it might be funny
to touch your face.
i bet if i tapped it,
it'd all just shatter
or maybe slither off
like the skin of a snake.
i wonder,
would i find this thought so funny
if i could really see you?
oh,
the wonders of makeup.

"topography"

i don't want much.
i am a simple girl.
i only want
a switch of worlds.
all i want,
all i really want
is to be part
of some beautiful topography.

That's it. La.

Gather around, all you poets,
And let me bend your ear,
The time for us to band together,
Has finally arrived here.
Send me all your poems,
All of them I need,
Refer to them upon the board,
And from it they'll be freed.
I have sought out many of them,
And their faces kissed,
But post a hint to where they are,
In case some of them I've missed.
My purpose behind this is simple,
My reasons very clear,
I am collecting them for a tome,
The time to publish is near.
I'm up to page 13 right now,
using ten point type,
When this piece of work is done,
It'll draw so much hype.
Being the most pollutiong poet,
I think it's up to me,
To gather these little suckers up,
Now, don't you agree.
So, stay tuned, my colleagues,
The reult will happen soon,
For I have the creative genius helping,
Yes - I've cornered Doom!
I also am pleased to announce,
A new Unwashed division.
Come and join the Poetry Bastards,
We greet slop with derision!                                                    

Cheers from the Land of Oz